Friday, August 1, 2014

5 Year Singleversary

Holy shit y'all. Today marks 5 years I have been a single girl! I don't know if I'm the only one that does this, but I actually kept track of the exact date when my ex and I broke up and it was a Saturday the first of August 2009. Guess you could say that was a memorable date for me because I lost the one person that I had loved so much and we officially ended our relationship after almost ten years.

Being in Orlando two weeks ago was a little hard for me for a sec. Blame it on the alcohol and what not, I had a moment. I was talking with a friend about how the last time I was there I was there with my ex. Florida was our last trip together and I was in college back then. We went to Disney World and Downtown Disney, we had a great time. Somewhere in telling her about him, I started crying; which was a bit embarrassing because I had just met her a few hours earlier and we were in a crowded hotel lobby drinking wine.

I guess not only being in a place where we last made some great memories, it's just a realization that I don't know anything about his life anymore and that makes me sad. It makes me sad to know that I shared a huge chunk of my life with this person only to never hear from him again and it's still something I gotta deal with. A part of me would like to reach out to him, but then I get scared shitless because what if I find out he married someone and has kids.. it would kill me.

I'm sure it wouldn't kill me of course, but this is my first love we're talking about. He's the one I pictured marrying one day and having his children. To find out the harsh reality that he moved on because obviously we both did, it would just be a blow to my soul, a slap in the face, a kick in the crotch. In other words, fucking painful as hell.

Enough about that though, I think y'all get my point. This is not to say that I haven't learned a lot about myself and there hasn't been any good to this singledom. This blog was born two years after the breakup, I have gone on some good and bad dates, I have grown wiser on not holding on to Mr. Big anymore, just becoming the woman I was meant to become and I'm so proud of her.

I've learned that I can enjoy my life and doing things for me. Being independent and self sufficient without the help from a guy has helped me a great deal. I've learned to be patient and enjoy the moment without focusing too much on the past or the future. Most importantly I've learned to love myself and value my worth and know what I will and not deal with. So cheers to that! Happy 5 Years to me!

PS. Last year's post Men Can Suck It makes me laugh now looking back.

Hoopla 2014 {Live Happy} Part I

Finally posting about my trip to Orlando from two weeks ago and I'll say it's better late than never so at last here is part one of my recap:

The flight
I am not a morning person so the fact that I made it to the airport an hour before my plane takes off was nothing short of a miracle. Once I got to my gate after getting a big cup of Starbucks heaven, they called my Group 1 to start boarding. I don't know if it was me, but I felt gigantic trying to get into my seat. Somehow it feels this plane was really tiny, but thankfully it's a short flight and we left on time.

While on the plane I met this nice lady sitting next to me and it made the flight that much more worthwhile because we had good conversation. I admit that I was so tired that I got a little dizzy, even though I took my Dramamine. Once we landed I was wide awake and anticipating what Orlando has to offer.

The hotel
I arrived around 10am to my hotel and on my way there I can't believe how much green I saw! Palm trees are my favorite so I was just taking it all in. As soon as I get out of my ride I get a water bottle handed to me by the door guy welcoming me to the Orlando World Center Marriott. I head over to the check in counter and there was hardly anyone waiting in line. Awesome!

I walk to the lobby and I spot a friend I have been messaging for us to meet right when I got to the hotel and mind you we only met online, but she is here for the same reason I am... the Stella & Dot annual sales conference {Hoopla}. She's from North Carolina and she's been a stylist for a couple of years. This is not her first time at the conference, but it sure was mine. She caught me up on everything about what's to come and how excited she is for me.

After chatting up with her I excused myself to head to my room because I was dog tired. I only had 4 hours of sleep so I needed some food and then sleep. So that's what I did and after napping for 3 hours I was ready to explore.

I sent Rico a pic of myself because he asked me to send him pics. So I sent him this selfie.

After having dinner solo I went up to some other stylists in the lobby, one of them I recognized. Got to meet people from California and had some vino while talking with them. Mind you I got there two days early, it was nice to know other people had gotten there early too this way I wouldn't be too alone.

So I finally headed up to my room and slept 'til 9 and I had to check out because my roomie was flying in in a couple of hours and so I headed downstairs for some breakfast and ran into the NC girl again in the lobby. Stay tuned for the rest of my Orlando recap.

I've been listening to Sam Smith's new album and I shit you not my eyes welled up listening to "Lay Me Down". But because Latch is my favorite song of his I wanted y'all to listen to the Acoustic version because his voice is entrancing and so fucking amazing. I get lost in his song, he seriously takes me to another place. I'm latching on to you Sam!

Happy weekend lovelies!

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

That 8 Hour Second Date

If you read my post yesterday you'll know that this is where I will tell you guys how my second date went with Rico. Once he picked me up we headed to uptown for some brunch at this one restaurant I hadn't been to before for Sunday brunch. They had mimosas also and that's always a must have for Sunday funday to be had by all.

We had our own separate breakfast entrees and then shared this delightful French toast with a Captain Crunch flare. It was so delicious! I was in a pure bliss state of mind. I love that he is a foodie and I think I mentioned that on the first date. It's been enjoyable sharing food with someone who also appreciates it as much as I do.

Anywhere I go I have to have eggs benedict as my go to breakfast food besides Honey Bunches of Oats (with almonds) cereal.

Some places do a decent job and this one was a-okay. The best eggs benedict I've had so far was at a Thai restaurant {Malai Kitchen} because they put shrimp on a bed of coconut cornbread instead of the English muffin. So out of this world!

Anyways, so after brunch we headed over to kill some time before going to the movies and we ended up at Costco. I really needed to buy some groceries since I wouldn't have time after going on our date and since it's Sunday everything closes early. Rico has a Costco membership so he used it to let me shop with him as a guest. Score!

I kept joking that he should add me onto his card, but really I'm not joking.

After that we finally headed to the movies and went to see Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. The movie was pretty good and I don't know what happened but by the end of it, I felt like my eyeballs were on fire. I'm getting old I guess and Rico also said his eyes were bothering too. We went back to get his car and said bye and hugged, then we talked some more and hugged again.

Throughout this entire day we spent together I felt like a princess. He is a really sweet man and knows how to treat a woman. I thought maybe we would have our kiss, but it didn't happen. I don't know what it is, but it somehow didn't feel like it was the right time yet. It's weird because sometimes you kiss random strangers on a whim {especially that alcohol to make you brave}, but with him I just can't do it because I don't want to rush it.

Who knows, maybe I'm over thinking things and need to just do it {hey that's what she said}. In the back of my mind though I just don't want to mess anything up, especially a first kiss. I want it to be special and for it to be natural. It's awkward trying to kiss someone in a parking lot where cars can drive by and spot you. Maybe if he invites me to his place it will finally happen. I guess I realized now that I really don't like PDA. I mean a kiss is not a big deal, but since it's the first kiss, I'm making it into this huge mountain when it's really a pinch of salt.

For shits and giggles; another theory of why I may be so hesitant about this kiss is that I have watched so much of Pretty Little Liars (Finally on Season 5) that I obsess that A is out there watching me trying to be brave to plant one on him. I think I know who A is, but don't spoil it because I have yet to fully catch up on the latest episodes. 

Maybe I just really like him and I'm scared. I'm scared of getting hurt again and/or something will happen that will make things go wrong and I'll never hear from him again. Like I said, he's treating me so good and I'm not used to that so automatically my mind thinks that something is gonna happen and it's gonna be taken away. For now, I just want to take my time and not get in over my head. As far as I'm concerned, I'm still dateless in the sense that I am still seeking that love that will hopefully evolve from a crush into a love that will set me free with joy. Or something.

This is what I wore with white jeans. I didn't realize this but this shirt looks like a watermelon and leopard mixed together. Love it!
So that was my confession of a blogaholic; what's yours?

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Last July Weekend

This past weekend was indeed the last weekend of July and I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. On Friday, I hung out with Ava and my good friend Tori. We went to see Lucy because that movie looked really good and it was pretty good indeed. I gotta say it was very intense and I love Scarlett.

Saturday I did a little shopping and stalled a bit because I was thinking Rico {his new nickname}, and I were going to have our second date for lunch. I didn't hear from him 'til 5 o'clock and I was a bit irritated. I thought it was strange I didn't hear from him because getting to know him these past two weeks, this is not usual.

He contacts me and says that he had texted me that morning that he wasn't going to make it. I told him I never got his message and he apologized. I made sure to let him know that even though it was a mishap that I didn't hear from him, I'm not a fan of cancelled plans or not hearing from someone. So I told him he should make it up to me by taking me to a nice restaurant. He agreed and apologized again.

I went to my friend Ana's birthday party that night and after dinner just headed home because I was tired from the week and hadn't even gone home to relax yet. I had fun though seeing old faces and we went to this restaurant I haven't been to since I was a teenager.

On Sunday I got up and got ready and asked Rico to pick me up and he did and I will post how our date went on the next post, so be sure to come back! I know you guys are dying to know and I can't wait to share.